As I am helping moderate a group discussing Imposter Syndrome on Clubhouse, it reminds me of something I do wearing another of my hats-Mentalist/Magician- that will help you.
I have an effect I do for men and women that results in me lifting them up, washing away their troubles and leaving them with a momento to take home that will give them that feeling anytime they touch it. It’s made people smile and made them cry.
As part of that, I talk about how we look in the mirror and see more than just our body…we see our heart, mind, soul. And all the negative comes at us from the person in the mirror, what we have thought about ourselves and every negative thing, no matter how minor, everyone has ever said. Sadly, it starts at a young age.
I tell them that sometimes you have to just tell the reflection to shut up. You’ve got this. Because “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is the biggest lie ever concocted. Bones heal faster than hearts…minds…souls.
I ask them wouldn’t it be nice, when you are feeling that way, if someone came along and offered some words to lift them up and on this item I give them will magically appear a small boost they can hang onto. Things like: “Drive to a remote area and scream”-“Stop fighting the tears, get it out”-“Why do you keep choosing mediocrity?”- just things they can apply to their lives that makes them think.
I have a regular customer at my restaurant gig who happens to do social work. She told me she wishes she could do this for her clients and encouraged me to continue this as it would have a deep impact. She was keeping what I gave her to help herself.
Even when you don’t have the mirror, you hear those voices. It leads to so much negative self talk and imposter syndrome. Change the voice, change the message. Remember the reflection is the puppet, YOU are the ventriloquist! What comes out of that mouth is under your control so control the puppet.
Jot down a quote, print a meme, copy an affirmation and keep it on you at all times. Something that, when you read it, makes you smile, gives you confidence, lifts you up. When you are feeling down, take it out and silence those voices. It’s psychological. It will help, if only for a bit.